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Stories of Hope, Belonging, and Longing

I gaze at my glass of water and am grateful for yesterday.  Yesterday, Mother’s Day, when my youngest son was baptized.

Just like my hands slip as I hold the dewy outside of my perspiring drink, I cannot fully grasp the meaning of his baptism. I am aware of the mystery of it all, of God choosing my son to be adopted into Christ, and of Luke obeying that call.

What I cannot grasp is how, and why, and what is to come. It feels fragile to me and yet more sure than anything. We are weak, and He is strong.

I see the drops on my glass dissipate, evaporating in the afternoon sunshine. And I wonder what is next for Luke in this journey of faith, this washed-clean start in a dirty world. 

I think back to what else I learned yesterday about water. About the Israelites quarreling with Moses, accusing him and God both for bringing them into the wilderness to die of thirst.

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I gaze at the puddles gathering on my deck and I wish them gone.

They speak of another damp, chilly spring day when I’m searching for summer. They nag me to don my navy rainboots and trench coat when I go outside. They force me to wipe the dog’s feet when she comes in from the backyard if I don’t want doggy footprints prancing across my floors.

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One of my heroes is a man named Daniel.

Like his namesake in the Bible, Daniel faces lions unafraid. He so heavily leans on the Lord that the lions can’t get between him and God.

This Daniel, the one I know, spends his days in one of the most dangerous neighborhoods in Chicago. He goes because he cares. He won’t give up on those whom most everyone else has.

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I’m thinking more about heaven these days.

What if I really lived with heaven in mind? What if heaven was my ultimate bucket list item, and all I did revolved around getting ready?

And then what if the reality of heaven really affected how I engaged with other people? What if I looked at everyone I talked to as someone with whom my interaction would move one step closer to or further away from heaven?

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Winter wanes and spring struggles. My faith mirrors the hyacinths outside my front door, straining up through cold stones, longing for sunlight.

Easter catches me by surprise and I admit my heart is not ready to celebrate Holy Week.

I stop by to visit my friends Pete and June, newly returned from their first trip to Israel. Maybe what they saw there will bring hope to my weary heart. Surely walking where Jesus walked brings new life to Easter, even when you’ve celebrated it for almost ninety years, as they have.

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